OKAY,yesterday I had been thinking of making some good out of life , and not just sit and wonder at my 40 ‘s that what I really did ,and what I ought to have done . Many ideas flared up in my mind which were singing the songs of excitement . One among such ideas were to learn singing and dancing at some tutorial classes which was not very far from my home , another thought that originated within my brain was to write as much as i could in these few days of 2013 , which would be a sought of a memory journal for myself .And the entourage of thoughts went on for about an hour . After my candid little fingers were actually paining to hold on to a pen between three fingers I decided to barricade my grains of excitement my brain had to the new coming cognition’s ,and I closed the list . After I had a review of what I had written for past one hour my animations of words of my brain on paper had failed .They were packed in a tight jar of security and a little protection that didn’t let me do even half of the list . The chattels I had written down included forces of family , society , friends , personal guilt , entertainment , excitement , non acceptable , bounded by rings of people on its periphery but indeed for a layman they only embodied with pretty little desires of singing , dancing, sky diving , painting , and workshops which would let me amplify the best out of me , but I was social not the Facebook one but I lived in a society were even coming out was a great big deal . There was absolutely a great seal which bounded this sheet of paper with my heart and all I could do is wait for somebody to break it from beneath.
Within one hour , I was back to my surroundings like i could feel the presence of my belongings that were so cozy because of winter snow flakes that had turned the greenery into grey thoughts and the life had a halt signature . It felt like I had lost all the power which laid within myself before I could see the empty lines of paper and I was like a dead bird attacked by the powerful force from the sky only .
I WAS BACK TO THE REALM OF MY HISTORY WHERE I COULD ONLY CHECK MY NERVES TO BE ALIVE , BUT HELL I WAS WASTING IT WITH EVERY DESIRE TO LIVE AS I LONGED .